Table of Contents
From the Author
Introduction
Chapter 1: The Push
Why We Set Resolutions
For the “New Car Smell” of It
For the Symbolism of It
For Post-Party Blues
Chapter 2: The Problem
Why We Break Resolutions
Easy Outs
Scaredy Cats
Don’t Sleep on It
Breaking the Barriers
Chapter 3: The Prep Work
How to Set Resolutions
The Right Mindset
Goal Setting
Keep the Ball Rollin
The Power behind the Pen
Chapter 4: The Path
How to Achieve Resolutions
Your Biggest Enemy
From Denial to Desire
Chapter 5: The Prelude
Why Wait?
If You Wait
The Lab Coat Syndrome
The Facts
No Options Left
Chapter 6: The Present
What’s Next
What Do I Know?
What Is Your Next Step?
What Is the Right Approach?
Chapter 7: The Potential
March On!
Chapter 8: The Plan
12 Steps to Change
Chapter 9: The (Your) Purpose
Do’s and Don’ts
Rule #2
Don’t give yourself an easy way out!
Why We Break Them
There is always a reason/excuse for not following through on things you start. Even though I’m not a psychologist, I can tell you it’s probably one or all of three things: fear, resentment and/ or denial.
Fear
For some, it may be a fear of failure or even accomplishment. In the past, you failed to follow through, so you’ve convinced yourself this time would be no different. The opposite of that would be the fear of success. What if I succeed and reach my goal, how could I maintain that? Just think about that - how self-defeating does that sound? Fear is a big manipulator.
Fear = False Evidence Appearing Real
Resentment
Could you be angry because of the very fact you have to set a resolution to get motivated? You resent having to work on your health; you wish you were back in the same shape you were at age twenty.
Denial
Are you flat-out denying your health? You admit you’re a few pounds overweight, but can’t come to grips with how seriously out of shape you are. We can find ways to justify anything. Denial is a really dangerous emotion.
Easy Outs
Let’s say you’re having dinner with a friend and this is the last time you will ever see them again. What do you say? Would you speak of superficial things or be in a hurry? I’m sure you would try to cherish every moment and talk about more meaningful things, wouldn’t you?
Time, relationships and material things are all parts of life we take for granted.
Have you ever taken a New Year’s resolution for granted? Have you ever thought that there will be another one next year so why try this time?
Scaredy Cat
Have you ever noticed how cats behave? When you want them around, they avoid you like the plague, but when you least expect it, they’re right under your nose.
When setting resolutions, you have to be careful to avoid setting yourself up for failure. This happens when your expectations are higher than the realities you have in your life.
If you’ll notice, there’s an attitude shift from December 31st to January 1st; people think they can easily go from not exercising at all to working out five days a week. While noble as that may sound, the brain must be laughing. Based on past performance, the brain can’t conceive of going from nothing to regular exercise in such a short period of time. So it just laughs and thinks, “Are you nuts?”
When this happens, you sabotage your goals and run from them like a scared cat. Do the work and the rest will follow!
Don’t Sleep on It
One day while having lunch, I met a guy who was in his early forties. He told me that he had quit smoking, after twenty years of two packs a day - just like that.
“How did you do it? Did you just wake up one morning and say ‘that’s it?’”
He said, “I didn’t have to wake up. It was ten years ago next month. I met a gentleman who suffered from emphysema. After that, I said, ‘That’s it; I will never smoke another cigarette again.’ And I haven’t had one or the urge since.” It was just like that? I asked. Just like that, he said.
Achieving your New Year’s resolutions is more of a mindset than a numbers game.
Breaking the Barriers
Everyone has a fear of something and many times you can think too much by analyzing it to death. The bottom line: barriers keep us from starting or finishing our New Year resolutions. The truth is these barriers are just illusions; they’re not real. If you figure out what you’re afraid of, resentful toward or in denial of, chances are you can break through them.
For most, getting started is not the highest hurdle; staying the course is. Motivation is much easier in the beginning, but the river of newly-found energy runs dry months later. Let’s look at ways to increase our staying power and our ability to stay focused; it really does start with a good sound decision from the heart.
When a meaningful decision is made, it’s almost impossible to turn back. Sure, you make excuses, but your heart doesn’t buy into them, so you keep going.
“While denial about your health may someday kill you, a deep desire to get healthier may save your life!”
Greg Ryan
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